Uncertain about the state of your mental health? Try this diagnostic metric, developed by top Nashville researchers from 1961 to 1962. (Citations.)
1) Are you:
a) feelin’ so lonely?
b) feelin’ so blue?
2) Did you previously know that:
(a) he/she/other would love you as long as he/she/other wanted;
(b) he/she/other would then someday leave you for somebody new?
3) (a) Do you worry?
(b) Why do you let yourself worry?
4) (a) Do you wonder, “What in the world did I do?”
(b) What did you do? [optional]
5) Did you think that your love could hold him/her/other?
6) Are you:
(a) tryin’?
(b) cryin’?
7) Are you nevertheless still lovin’ him/her/other?
Rank yourself one point for each positive response. However, regardless of the rest of the questionnaire, if you answered in the affirmative to the final question, it is near-certain that you are, in fact, “crazy.” Condolences.
